I filled two pages of this diary with stuff. But I don't think I should keep it there. It was a lot of anger and hurt and confusion. Just getting things out of my head. I don't even want to look at them now, so I think they can just go into the fire.
I have to learn to be more...what is the word? Pa used to say it sometimes. Not "temperature" but something like that. It means more even-keeled. That's what I need to work on with myself. I don't think I'm the sort of person to fly into wild passions at the drop of a hat or anything, but...well, with certain folk, you need to sort of change the way you are a little bit. Just to keep things peaceful. Ma used to say, "You can be right, or you can be happy" when she were talking about trying to understand hard-to-understand folk. In other words, even if they don't make sense to you or you think they're wrong about something, it's better sometimes to just leave it be and keep the peace.
I told Master Tumunir how I felt about everything. He said there were nothing wrong with me. He said a lot of other things, too. Really kind, warm words that touched me deep and made me want to cry. He opened up a little last night, just before I went to bed. It surprised me. I know it weren't easy for him, and I tried to move and talk as gentle as I could, I didn't want to ruin it. He's found such a place in my heart. It's funny how you just suddenly realize how much you care for someone, when you didn't even know they existed a year before. But now I'm starting to worry
Miss Lumina asked me to meet her in Bree to talk about the things she'd need for winter. I were right, she is Mister Leoffrith's lady! She's quite peculiar looking, but not in a bad way at all. She's beautiful and has a nice, calm way about her. She gave me a long list of things she'll need, and I'll have to start working on them right away as there was so much! I felt a little overwhelmed, but I just need to take a breath and start with the first thing and not get myself all frazzled. She even gave me a silver penny! Which was much more than she owed, but she said it were because she'd given me such a large order all at once. That was such a generous and kind thing for her to do! Mister Leoffrith came in before I went on my way, and I couldn't help thinking how odd they look together. He's so pale and she's so dark! But they seem happy and they're both from foreign parts, so if they're happy, that's all that matters, aye?
Mister Leoffrith asked if I could mend shirts or make horse blankets. My brain were starting to feel like it might pop from all the things people are asking me to do when I'm just barely starting out and only got two hands! Somewhere during all of this, Mister Theo appeared and just sat down with a grin beside me, bless his wooly toes. I were thinking to ask him where Miss Gustine might be, when she popped up like a rabbit out of a hole, right behind him. It's hard for me to keep up in a big group of folk talking, but I did manage to tell Miss Gustine that her scarf is ready and mended. And I did tell Mister Leoffrith that aye, I can mend a shirt if it's something simple, but I've never tried to make anything so big as a horse blanket. He said, if I felt up to it, he would put my name to Mister Rosewood if I thought I could manage some wool blankets for the horses.
It's a bright, cool day outside. I think I'll go sit by the bridge for a little while. It gets dark so early now, and I'll have all evening to work on my knitting.
